


I Relish You (Comes With Extra Relish)

by allmilhouse



Category: Bob's Burgers (Cartoon)
Genre: Bathtub Sex, M/M, Public Kissing, Shower Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-01-29
Packaged: 2019-03-09 07:05:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13476252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allmilhouse/pseuds/allmilhouse
Summary: A day in the life of Teddy! Where he agrees to help Bob go to the restaurant supply store, they have a fight, make up in the parking lot, and take things further at Helen's beach house.All beach house references come from s5e19 'Housetrap', so this is set sometime after that





	I Relish You (Comes With Extra Relish)

Teddy started the day he began most mornings- groggily. He'd been waking up before 7am for years now, but he would never get used to it. The bright sunlight streaming through the windows made him wince, and he groaned the entire short walk to his bathroom. After a quick shower, he dressed in his usual work clothes and headed to his kitchen for a cup of coffee. Despite his usual appetite, Teddy rarely ate breakfast- choosing two cups of coffee before heading the work, and saving his hunger for lunch. He donned his hat before leaving, his ex-wife's words ringing in his head ("My head is shaped like a butt," he agreed in his head, a little sadly). 

His schedule for the day was fairly light. First he went to Reggie's Deli to fix a leaky pipe, and after that it was over to Mort's to rewire a few lights. He and Mort talked while they worked, but Teddy still felt spooked. A mortician's lab was not a great place to catch up with a friend. But Teddy didn't want to say anything now, not while he was up a ladder in a basement that felt _incredibly_ haunted.

After that it was time for lunch. Well, it was 11:30, but one of the perks of being self-employed meant he could clock out whenever he felt like it. He asked Mort to join him, but he said he was swamped. So Teddy walked alone next door to Bob's Burgers, like he did every day he wasn't called out of town for work. The door chimed as he entered, and Linda looked up from behind the counter. 

"Hey Teddy!" she called, before turning towards the kitchen. "Bobby, Teddy's here!"

A minute later Bob Belcher came out from the kitchen to greet his friend. "Hey Teddy, how's it going?" He asked, sounding a little frazzled.

"Not bad, how's the Burger family?" he replied, sitting down at the counter. 

Bob laughed. "No, Teddy, it's not-we're the Belchers. Never mind. Uh, we've been better."

"Bob's just mad the kids got detention," Linda explained. "He was hoping they would go to the restaurant supply store with him after school, but now they can't, and he's grumpy about it."

"I'm not grumpy Lin! I was counting on them to help me. They're having a condiment blowout, and I can't carry all those boxes of ketchup by myself." Bob huffed, crossing his arms, looking very grumpy. 

"I can help you, Bobby," Teddy offered. "I only have one thing lined up this afternoon, and it can wait."

"Are you sure, Teddy?" Bob asked with concern. "I don't want you to lose any work just to help me out."

Teddy shook his head. "Nah, it's alright. It's not a rush job anyway. Can we go after lunch though? I'm starving." 

"Sure thing, Teddy. The usual?" Bob asked, heading back to the kitchen without waiting for a response. Teddy _always_ ordered the usual. As much as he cared for Bob's burgers, he never bothered to try the daily special ("I like the original! It's a classic!" was his argument). Linda started pouring him a cup of coffee, smiling as she brought it to him.

"Thank you for agreeing to help Bobby today," she said gratefully. "He was really down in the dumps about not getting to go, and you know how worked up he can get sometimes."

"It's no trouble, Linda," he said, taking his first sip. "I'm always glad to help the Burger family."

She laughed as she patted his hand, before walking away to help a couple at one of the tables. Teddy looked around, trying to distract himself. This usually happened, especially on days when Mort didn't join him for lunch. Teddy typically hung around for over an hour, and got plenty of time to catch up with Bob and Linda, often joining in on their hijinks. But they did have a restaurant to run, and sometimes Teddy was left to his thoughts while the needs of the business took priority. He glanced over to the chalk board and saw the Burger of the Day (the 'Dough for it Burger'- comes on a sourdough roll), and it took it as a sign of encouragement. He smiled softly, just as Bob returned from the kitchen with his food. 

"Here you go, Teddy," he smiled back, putting the plate down.

"Thanks, Bobby! Mmm, s'good!" he said while chewing.

"You can slow down, Teddy. Wait for it to cool down, at least. We can't leave until after the lunch rush." Here Bob nodded towards the door, where a couple looked like they might enter, before changing directions completely and turning towards Jimmy Pesto's across the street. "Dammit!" 

The lunch rush did eventually show up, but the restaurant never felt too crowded, only filling up about halfway. Teddy finished his lunch, and had a few more cups of coffee to kill the time. About a quarter past one Bob re-emerged from the kitchen without his apron, asking if he was ready to go.

"Sure thing, Bob. My truck or yours?"

"Is mine ok? It has more backseat space, and I'm planning on stocking up."

"Don't go too crazy, Bobby!" Linda warned. "Remember last summer, when you thought you could get a great deal on herbs? Every burger for a month came on a bed of seasonings."

"It wasn't that bad," Bob protested.

"It was a dark time," Teddy admitted. 

"See? Teddy, you keep an eye on him, alright?" Linda begged him. "Take special care of my Bobby. Save him from himself. Now have fun you too!"

The men walked around to the alley out back, where Bob kept his red station-wagon. They slid into their seats, Bob behind the steering wheel, and the car shuddered to life. Bob pressed a button on the console, and the hard rock stylings of Zentipede flowed from the dusty speakers. 

"Sorry, force of habit," Bob apologized. "Do you mind the music or? 'Cause I can turn it off."

"Nah, it's alright. My truck still doesn't have a radio so it's a nice treat, to hear music for once." 

"Oh, Teddy," Bob said sadly, before shaking his head and shifting into gear. It was a short drive, and they talked most of the way.

"Are you sure you don't mind helping me out today? I feel bad knowing you're missing out on work because of me."

"It's no big deal," Teddy reassured him. "You remember Helen, that nice lady with the beach house? I was supposed to go check on her deck, and make sure the exterior's looking fine before the weekend. But like I said, it can wait until tomorrow." Teddy noticed Bob's hands clutching the wheel tighter. Every line in his body had grown tenser, and he frowned heavily.

"Something wrong, Bobby?" Teddy asked worriedly. 

"Wha- no, it's just all this traffic," Bob lied, gesturing to the one other car on the road.

"Oh yeah," Teddy agreed. "That guy's all over the place. Anyway, yeah, guess Helen's seeing some investment broker guy, and they've been visiting her beach house a lot lately. So she's paying me to check on it and tidy things every two weeks or so."

"Oh! I mean, oh no, Teddy," Bob's voice couldn't quite managing hiding his excitement behind concern. "I'm sorry that Helen's seeing someone else. I know how you had a crush on her."

"It's probably for the best. She likes the finer things in life, stuff I could never give her. Ah well." Teddy trailed off, looking out the passenger window just as the restaurant supply store came into view. Bob wanted to say something else, something to cheer Teddy up, but he couldn't think of anything, and just parked the car quietly in an empty corner of the lot.

Their moods brightened as they entered the store however. Bob became like a kid in a candy store, and his energy was infectious. Teddy stood back and marvelled at his friend, who skipped up each aisle, excited about the minutiae of restaurant supplies. 

"Look, Teddy! There's a 2-for-1 on napkins! With the money I'll save on the big condiment blowout, I could afford to get these!"

Teddy chuckled nervously. "Take it easy, Bobby. Remember Linda said not to buy everything in the place."

"Yeah, but if I buy these now, we won't need to shop for like, two whole months. It's an investment!" Bob insisted. 

"Alright then," Teddy capitulated, helping Bob lift a second box of napkins into their cart. "But after this, we go straight to the condiments. No stops along the way."

Bob frowned a little, but agreed. With all the napkins in the cart, they wouldn't have space for anything else besides the condiments anyway. And they barely had room for those, since Bob was insisting on 6 boxes of each. The ketchup Teddy could understand, but the relish?

"We use relish, Teddy!" Bob shouted, starting to lose it. "I'm planning on some relish based specialities next month, and I need 6 boxes of relish."

"You can't afford all this relish, Bobby! Linda will kill me if I let you bring home this much relish!" Teddy was standing his ground, refusing to give up. He knew Linda was counting on him to keep Bob sane, and he wouldn't let her down, no matter how many people were now staring at them fighting in the middle of the store. 

"How do you know what I can afford, Teddy? I think I know my business better than you do!"

"Yeah, well I see how busy it gets, Bob. And I love you too much to see you throw away the only money you have on relish! GRR!" Teddy growled, grabbing a box from the top of the cart and slamming it to the ground. The relish burst everywhere, spilling mostly on their clothing, but also definitely leaving a mess on the floor. Teddy was breathing heavily, instantly regretting escalating the situation. He turned towards Bob, who stood next to the cart, frozen and covered in relish. 

"I'm sorry, Bob. That one's on me. I'll pay for that, and for uh, cleaning your clothes too. I kinda lost it there," he shrugged ruefully. "I'd say it's been a day, but it really hasn't. Sorry Bob. Bob?" Bob was still frozen, as if the whole incident had shaken him up. Teddy was a little worried, because honestly, he'd seen the Belcher kids throw worse tantrums in more embarrassing places. 

"Did you mean it, Teddy? Do you really love me?" Bob asked in a shaky voice. He still wasn't moving, and he kept looking at the puddle of relish on the floor, afraid to meet Teddy's eyes. 

"What?"

"You shouted you- before you threw the box, you said that you loved me too much to see me waste my money," he said quietly. "Did you mean that?"

"Well, uh, yeah, Bobby. I do."

The small crowd that gathered around to watch the fight cheered. Everyone in the store must have heard the commotion, and came over to see what was happening. They must have gotten the wrong impression and assumed it was a lovers' quarrel, which Bob figured out instantly.

"Oh no, it's not- that's not what we-"

"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" the crowd started to chant. 

"Oh my god."

"Yeah, Bobby, that wasn't exactly what I meant."

"I know Teddy, but they're not going to stop." Bob pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. 

"Well, let's make them stop." Teddy suggested. 

"Wha-" Bob looked up just in time to see Teddy's face barreling at him. They were both awkward kissers, and it wasn't a particularly pleasant sight, but the crowd lapped it up. They didn't know when it was acceptable to break apart, so they just kept kissing. Teddy opened his eyes to see Bob looking at him oddly, but from what he could tell he was enjoying the kiss. They were still together, and Teddy was worried they'd never stop, when finally they heard a loud voice.

"Ok, ok, break it up here!" An employee in an ugly orange vest broke through the crowd, that had turned on them again and were now muttering things like "Ok, we get it" and "Get a room already". 

"Uh, sorry?" Bob offered, by way of introduction. 

"Sorry? Sorry?" The employee scoffed. "You destroy product, you cause a makeout scene to distract from it, and all you have to say is sorry?"

"Hey, lay off him," Teddy began, placing a hand on Bob's chest to push him back. "I threw your box here, and I'll pay for it. This guy just came in to buy some condiments for his restaurant. All he wanted was one nice, normal day, but no. I had to ruin it, and your crowd of perverts over there didn't help!"

"Hey, that's not fair!" One guy from the crowd called out.

"Get out of here, man. Why are you still watching this?" Teddy growled, before addressing the employee again. "Sorry. Here, I can help clean this up, and when we get to the till, I'll pay for the stuff I ruined. Ok?"

"NO! No, thank you, but you've one enough damage. We'll clean it up, you two just pay and get out. And if you ever cause a disturbance again, then you won't be welcomed back. That's right, you'll have to shop at the wholesaler across the street." The employee rushed away, leaving the men in their mess. The crowd had finally dissipated at least, giving them a moment alone. 

"We, we should probably talk. About this." Teddy gestured confusingly between the two of them. 

"Maybe we should get out of here first. That guy seemed really angry." Bob pushed the cart down the aisle, away from the relish puddle, not bothering to replace the box. They got out of there in a hurry, but not before Teddy paid for the whole order. He left his name and number in case the manager wanted anymore retribution form them, and was offering to take the blame for the whole ordeal, if they left Bob out of it. The teenaged cashier didn't seem to care much, but wrote it all down anyway. They left the store into the bright afternoon sun, and filled the back of Bob's car in silence, before getting in. They sat still for a few moments, the air heavy with tension. 

"You didn't have to pay for everything, Teddy," Bob started. "You didn't even have to pay for the broken stuff. I'm an adult, I can pay for my own mistakes."

"I know you can, but I wanted to make it up to you. I ruined your trip to the store, and I felt bad about it. Stupid Teddy losing his cool shopping for relish. Classic Teddy!"

"You're not stupid, Teddy. You're the nicest guy I know. You're the best customer I could ever have, and also, you're my best friend. You're always there when I need you, and I did appreciate you offering to help me today. And you wouldn't have lost your cool if I wasn't taking too much relish." Bob smiled, and looked over at Teddy, who was still looking down at his feet. He reached out and took Teddy's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

"Thanks, Bobby," Teddy smiled back, looking up. "And earlier, what I meant was- well, I love you. You're my best friend too. I see you every day at lunch, and it's the highlight of my day. You're the best cook I know, and just getting to spend time with you and the Burger family," here Bob laughed, "well, it's wonderful".

Bob sighed, before pulling back his hand and taking his head in his hands. "Teddy, I don't know how to tell you this, but I love you too. But, not just as a best friend." 

It all started to make sense for Teddy. The surprisingly motivational burger of the day, Linda telling him to take special care of Bob, the kids getting detention when Teddy knew full well that they had been in detention the week before. The whole family must've planned this day, trying to get Bob alone with Teddy to confess his feelings. 

"Bobby," Teddy started slowly. "Did you mean to do this at the restaurant supply store? Is that your kind of idea for a first date?"

Bob laughed hysterically, some of the tension visibly leaving his shoulders. "Honestly, no. I was planning on stopping by the beach on the drive back. Actually I wasn't expecting you to say yes so soon. I thought we'd be doing this later, like at sunset, not at 2pm. And the relish definitely wasn't part of the plan."

"Yeah, what was the deal with the relish?" Teddy inquired. 

"Ugh, this sounds so bad," Bob groaned. "But, it was kind of for you? I know you usually stick the usual burger, but I thought maybe if I made some less flamboyant specials, maybe you'd finally give one a try."

"I like your specials, Bob!" Teddy insisted. "Sometimes a guy just wants a plain burger, you know? If it means that much to you, I can start ordering the special."

"No, no Teddy, I don't want you doing anything you don't want to do just for my sake," Bob said seriously. "for burgers, or- or anything else."

"What else did you have in mind, Bobby? We already put on a bit of a show for those creeps at the store."

"And you didn't mind it?" Bob asked in wonder. 

"Well, I wasn't a fan of the crowd, but it wasn't so bad. A little weird. Ok, really weird. But I like you, and I kind of want it to happen again."

"Ok, well, you want to fool around a bit in the backseat?" Bob suggested, before looking back. "Crap, never mind, there's too much stuff back there. Oh my god, why did I buy so many napkins?"

"I tried to stop you-" Teddy interjected. 

"Not now Teddy! Ugh, ok, uh, we can't go to the beach now, because it's broad daylight and there's too many kids around."

"I know where we can go," Teddy said confidently. "How about the beach house?"

"Helen's beach house? Isn't that- wouldn't that be weird for you, since you had a big crush on her?"

"I go there twice a month, and it hasn't been weird yet. My house is messy, and Linda and the kids will be at yours- where else could we go?"

Bob hummed in agreement, and they set off for the beach house. The drive wasn't too long, but they stayed quiet, unsure of what to say. They were taking a big step here, and neither wanted to ruin the fragile moment by saying something stupid. Bob still seemed nervous and hesitant, but Teddy wasn't sure what to do in this situation. He'd never been put in this place before- having someone pursuing him. It felt weird, but he was trying to enjoy it.

They pulled up the drive, and Teddy unlocked the front door for them. They stood around awkwardly for a moment trying to figure out the best first move.

"Ugh, what's that smell?" Bob complained, wrinkling his nose and killing the moment.

"Uh, that would be us. From the relish. And the long drive in the hot sun." Teddy sniffed his shirt. "Yep, that's us."

"Ah. Hmm, maybe we should take a shower then?" Bob said slowly, trying to be seductive. 

"It's a great tub," Teddy added. "They've got a jacuzzi."

"Sounds great then. Do you know how the washing machine works? Maybe we can clean our clothes while we take a shower?"

"Good idea, Bob. Give me your clothes." Teddy started taking his shirt off, and the two men stripped in the foyer of the beach house. Teddy took the pile of clothes to the laundry room, near the kitchen, while Bob walked upstairs to get the shower started. He paused in front of the washer, taking a deep breath. Teddy wasn't worried about what was going to happen. He was the kind of guy who blundered head first into any situation, no matter what it was, and he figured taking a shower with a best friend who maybe has feelings for you sounds like one of the less painful places he's found himself in. But he was worried a bit about Bob. Bob, who apparently had been planning this day, with the help of his wife and family. Teddy would admit he couldn't fully understand it, but for some reason he must be what Bob needs in his life right now, and the thought of letting Bob down was stressful. 

He heard the sound of the pipes starting up, and knew Bob must have figured out the shower by now. Teddy tossed a cup of detergent into the washer and shut the lid, before turning and heading up the stairs. He found Bob in the master bathroom, next to the walk-in shower. It was a tastefully decorated room, a darker shade than most of the house, with brownish sandstone tiles everywhere. The sink and toilet sat on one side, the expansive jacuzzi took up most of the other wall, and the centrepiece was the lavish shower. Bob was reaching in, fiddling with the knobs, and cursing softly. He looked up when he saw Teddy enter. 

"Hey, sorry Teddy, I couldn't get the right balance between cold and hot." He reached his hand under the water to test it again, and yelped in pain. "Crap, still too hot."

Teddy nodded towards the tub. "Why don't we start with a soak first? At least I know how it works."

"Sure, that sounds like it could be fun," Bob said, turning the shower off. He burned his hand again by accidentally hitting the stream of water, and Teddy reached out to take it in his colder hands. He held it softly for a minute while Bob sighed contentedly. "That feels nice, Teddy," he said, closing his eyes. 

Teddy finally let go to get the tub filled up. He commanded Bob to sit down first, as the water started rising, and he got the jets running. Bob sat back and let the water do its trick, feeling the stress and anxiety of the day washing off him. He looked up to see Teddy hovering at the edge of the tub, unsure if he should join him or not. Bob reached his arms out, inviting his friend into the water.

"C'mon in Teddy. The water's fine," he said, smiling sincerely. 

"Yeah, sure, Bobby," Teddy replied, awkwardly stepping over Bob's legs to sit on the other side. The tub was large enough for two people to sit opposite one another, or for one person to starfish out comfortably. Bob was mostly sprawled out, and Teddy was trying to keep a semi-respectful distance. Bob sensed his hesitance.

"We don't have to do this, you know. If it feels bad at all, just tell me. I just want to make you feel good, Teddy."

"You always make me feel good, Bob. I just don't know what to do here." Teddy said honestly. He didn't look worried, and actually he felt pretty good about himself. If you'd asked him yesterday if he was attracted to Bob Belcher he'd have said no, but now, with a very naked Bob floating in front of him, he couldn't deny he was feeling _something_. 

"Why don't we try kissing again? That went well earlier, right?" Bob asked, suddenly doubting himself. 

"Good idea, Bobby. Just let me get this here-" Teddy shifted his body awkwardly until he was finally laying on top of Bob, the water having not quite filled up enough to cover their chests. 

"Well hello there," Bob said as seductively as he could muster.

"Hi!" Teddy replied energetically, before leaning in to kiss Bob again. For the second time that they found themselves kissing, and once again it was better than either man expected. Bob felt soft and inviting, his moustache tickling far less than Teddy imagined it would. Bob slipped his tongue in, and Teddy responded by moaning deeply, and raking his hands up and down Bob's sides. This spurred Bob on, reaching his arms around to hold Teddy closer to him, pressing him down fully on his chest, and feeling his weighty body cover him completely. 

"I like feeling you," was Bob's explanation, when they broke apart and Teddy looked at him confused. "I sort of like how you're bigger than me. Especially your hands."

"Really?" Teddy wondered, pulling up one of the hands in question. 

"Mm-hmm. Do you mind?" here Bob grabbed Teddy's hand by the wrist, and pulled it back down, towards their dicks. Bob had been fully hard since they first got in the tub, and Teddy was starting to get there himself, which pleased Bob immensely. Teddy had held Bob's dick before- one time when Bob was injured, and needed help going to the bathroom. It was the kind of awkward situation they never brought up again, but now it came in handy, giving Teddy a bit of an advantage. Bob was thicker than he was, but not as long, which meant he had to shimmy down a bit so they could line up properly. Bob frowned, seeing Teddy move out of kissing range, but immediately changed his expression when Teddy brought them into contact, grabbing both dicks in his large hand. He gave a few experimental tugs, before switching to a speedy rhythm. 

Bob arched his neck back, trying to find a good angle. Teddy looked up, seeing Bob twist around, and slowed his pace. 

"Sorry, too fast?" he asked in concern.

"No, no, keep going!" was the reply. "Sorry, had a jet up my-" Bob cut himself off with a moan.

Teddy had redoubled his efforts, giving Bob a new reason to squirm. He panted heavily, the water not quite high enough to reach him yet. He tried twisting his wrist, and Bob started yelling. He repeated the twist a few more times, and that was enough to send Bob over the edge. He kept going though, and looked at right at Bob. Their eyes met, and Bob looked a little awkward. 

"Want to finish on me?" Bob asked shyly. 

Teddy was taken aback by the request and gripped himself too hard out of shock. That did it, and he came in spurts over Bob's chest, before falling bonelessly on top of him with a grunt. They laid there in peace for a few minutes, catching their breath and listening to the water slosh around. It finally rose to about chest level, and Teddy kicked his leg out behind him to turn it off. Unfortunately his foot caught a bottle of bubble bath, and it fell on his back, spilling everywhere. 

"Oof. Great, now I'm sticky on both sides." he grumbled. 

"Maybe we should take that shower now, if you still wanted to?" Bob asked, half seductive half anxious. 

"Sure thing Bobby, just let me get this over here," he moved his arms from around Bob's sides to the edge of the tub, and with great effort, pried himself up. He pulled the drain on his way out and walked over to the shower, humming to himself. The knobs were nowhere near as complicated as Bob made them out to be, and he had the shower running in about ten seconds flat. 

Bob was at his side in a moment, playfully pushing Teddy under the stream of water. Teddy smiled, and splashed Bob right back, before wrinkling his nose.

"There's still some relish in your hair, Bobby," he complained, looking away. "Aha!" Teddy reached out and grabbed a bottle of shampoo hanging from the decorative shower caddy. "Here, can I wash your hair?"

"Uh, sure?" Bob replied, ducking down a bit so Teddy could reach the top of his head. He sniffed a moment later. "Is that lavender?'

Teddy consulted the back of the bottle. "Lavender and honeysuckle. Helen's got good taste."

"Ugh, I'm gonna smell like a candle," Bob complained.

"Not if I can't reach everywhere." Teddy shot back. His hands really only came up to about Bob's ears, and he wouldn't be able to massage the shampoo in very well. 

"Well, how about I try this?" Bob said suggestively, before _very_ slowly sinking to his knees. "Ah! Sorry, joint pain. But does this work?"

Teddy swallowed at the sight of Bob kneeling in front of him, before acknowledging. "Yeah, that should work." He started slowly, trying to be gentle. Teddy didn't get many chances to do something soft like this, getting to show off how delicate he could be with his hands if he tried. Bob got to constantly, whether flipping burgers or helping the kids with something child-sized. But Teddy rarely had anyone to depend on him like this, and it felt intoxicating. The proximity was getting to him too. This was definitely the most intimate he'd ever been with anyone before, and that includes his ex-wife. 

He was lost in his own thoughts, shampooing on autopilot, when Bob startled him by kissing his thigh. He jumped a little, and Bob pulled back instantly.

"Crap! Sorry, Teddy, too much?" he asked.

"No, no, just spooked me, is all. Keep going."

Spurred on, Bob kissed a path up both of Teddy's thighs before zeroing in on his dick, which was beginning to get aroused again. Bob examined it in his fingers for a moment before looking back up at Teddy, who paused washing Bob's hair for a minute to see what his friend was up to down there.

"I haven't done this in years, but if you don't mind, I'll try?" Bob offered.

"Uh, sure," Teddy agreed, not really sure what they were talking about.

He got the picture a second later when Bob took him in his mouth, a little at first, acclimatizing. His tongue was swirling up and down the shaft while the hand not being used for balance gently cupped Teddy's balls. Teddy reached out, trying to find anything to hold on to, and was only able to grab Bob's head for balance. He threaded his hands through Bob's thinning hair, while Bob hummed contentedly around Teddy's dick. He pulled off momentarily, swapping positions between his mouth and hands, and Teddy called out something resembling a warning. Bob took that as encouragement, and thumbed at the slit while sucking on both balls, and Teddy came instantly, messing up Bob's hair again. Teddy groaned for a second, keeping his eyes closed while still holding onto Bob's head for support. 

"Uh, Teddy?" Bob asked, breaking the moment. "Sorry, but I need to stand up again, my knees are killing me."

Teddy stepped back, and offered a hand to his kneeling friend. Bob smiled back at him, unsure of what to do next. The answer came to Teddy as he rinsed the leftover shampoo from his hands.

"Hey, check this out!" he shouted over the water, before shutting off that stream, and turning a different knob. Suddenly water fell from the ceiling. Bob looked up to see a mounted nozzle in the centre of the shower, something he mistook as a light earlier. Teddy walked him back a step until he was directly under it, getting soaked. "Isn't it great?" Teddy asked excitedly. "It's just like being outside in the rain!"

He pulled Bob in for a kiss, and it felt very dramatic, under the falling water. They broke apart for air, and Teddy boldly reached out to touch Bob. He was gaining confidence in this, gradually catching on to what he thought Bob needed in the moment. He got one arm around his shoulder, bring him in for another sloppy, wet kiss, while his other hand snaked down to stroke his erection. Bob gasped into his mouth when Teddy finally got his hands on him, but Teddy kept him close, and they kissed their way through Bob's second orgasm of the day. 

They stayed together, just holding each other under the water, before Teddy reached up and finally rinsed Bob's hair out. He rubbed his own chest and back clean, and they both hand-rubbed anywhere else that felt a little dirty. Teddy killed the stream, and stepped out into the chill bathroom to grab towels for both of them. Bob took his gratefully, and Teddy just replied with a genial smile. He headed downstairs to throw the clothes in the dryer, and stopped to catch his reflection in a hall mirror. He looked the same, maybe a little cheerier. The bags under his eyes seemed less pronounced, and maybe it was the lighting, but his bare head didn't look like a butt here. He hummed a little, and continued to the laundry room. 

He set the dryer on quick cycle, figuring they didn't want to spend all day trespassing at the beach house, but was proven wrong by finding Bob down in the games room, eyeing the pool table.

"Twenty minutes until the clothes are done," Teddy informed him.

"Alright. Is that enough time for strip pool?" Bob asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"I've only got one towel on, Bobby!" Teddy protested, before caving in two seconds after. "Ah, it'll be fine." They played for a good half an hour. Bob _severely_ overestimated his skill, and Teddy wound up winning all six rounds.

"C'mon Bobby, strip for me!" he called out cheerfully. 

Bob groaned dramatically, before glancing at the table and getting an idea. He put his hands on the sides, and heaved himself up on top of it. Teddy clapped and whistled as Bob took a few steps on his mock stage, before theatrically whipping off his towel and launching it at Teddy. Teddy laughed and hollered, before walking over and helping Bob down. They struggled (Bob was not a light man), but managed to do it without breaking the pool table.

Teddy sighed and wiped the laughter tears from his eyes, before glancing at the clock on the wall. 

"Hey, Bobby, it's almost 4:30. You gotta get back for the dinner rush." 

"Ugh, you're right. Let's go get dressed."

They walked back to the laundry room in a slightly less cheerful mood, before dressing quickly and leaving the house behind. The whole afternoon felt unreal to Teddy, and he was a guy who often got roped into unusual situations with Bob. Today had been different though, and all the time they'd spent at the house felt like something out of a movie. They didn't say anything for most of the drive, both afraid to break the spell. But then the familiar outline of the wharf came into view, and they were back at the Bay. 

Teddy started it. "Listen, Bobby. I don't really know exactly what today was supposed to be, but it was good. I had fun with you today, but then I always had fun with you. What I'm trying to say is, today was a good day."

"Thanks, Teddy. I had fun today too. I was worried, for a while, that you might not have wanted to do any, uh, of the things we did today, but you came through for me. You always do."

"I always will, Bob. I do love you."

Bob smiled, pulling up to the restaurant. "I love you too, Teddy. So, you'd be ok doing this again or-"

"Want to come over Friday?" teddy interjected breathlessly. "We could watch the hockey game and you could stay at my place for a while. I'll even clean!"

"Sure, Teddy. Thanks again for the help today." Bob pointed at the trunk full of condiments. 

"No worries. I'll see you tomorrow, for a relish burger?"

Bob laughed. "Of course. See you Teddy!"

Teddy left the car, seeing the Belcher kids getting ready to leave the restaurant to come help their dad bring in all the supplies. He thought about helping them, but he needed some alone time. He walked back to his truck, still parked in front of Mort's. He looked in the small windows, but didn't see Mort, so he hopped in the truck and headed back to his place. He thought about having another shower, to get the smell of Bob off of him, then changed his mind. He got through his front door, and went straight to the kitchen. He made himself a microwave hot dog and covered it in relish.

**Author's Note:**

> I had, like, 4 different ideas for this pairing, but this was the only one I could extrapolate into something, and it still went through several major shifts so, yeah I don't know anymore. I'm so sorry


End file.
